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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”5 u$ x0 x$ s* B7 {
8 q# K: R: N, d7 p2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
4 w/ ^2 y3 P5 e% T
. F7 c7 V0 ], `, a8 D- w男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”; B$ C' h7 M& O8 e) H
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。0 X% l! w& P3 E6 t7 t
1 [* C, T6 N: a6 P v- N老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。3 \" ]+ \2 j. h8 d
8 l: ?3 `7 c7 P3 X- O1 H
女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。7 @5 j7 V* L& c
- @ `- V# x& Q! h) M# V# |笑死我了。。。( q o3 o* @2 k* C) O% `
( [; X4 `8 X( C5 g- p4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，% f. X7 _; b9 s7 N- ~
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!! s9 `" I$ g9 [7 q, t/ g
* P5 {" l8 F: l# y" \$ b3 H她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”2 J6 m: e2 g( Z4 B4 d
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恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…) @, }! ^1 J1 u
* B m0 `0 I$ l5 ^ n, V) Z+ U5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，
; ?" s# C' E0 u; U# k3 p- J! A- `7 {9 Y F7 ^" t3 \
我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！, Q) f8 W& D. t
0 a0 Y; {4 E! P一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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* P( d' w4 f! @- K; {" h$ N9 V当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？
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我，无业闲人一个。
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. ?0 Z6 V4 t5 v" @& F) z5 O女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？, V; u" i! p6 j- `
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我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。* T$ w4 L; Z' A. e: s
/ k" d# N% ^7 A7 D' C" t( b4 e- x女：滚她妈犊子，滚…- x E, O {) T p. v
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当前离线
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