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[lastpost] => 2757842 沪指创近十年新高，两市成交额2.76万亿（转自新浪网） 1755518330 天策-思思
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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
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2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”- j7 O8 X& M+ M" C- a, u" g
& | j( E ]# q7 A7 m9 X0 E8 `3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。0 ^; w7 Q8 J/ T) [: E1 J5 H
! w9 k, @/ Z* ^ v老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。, y% ~1 a- [4 u" W$ h/ C
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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笑死我了。。。. ?1 {6 s9 M% a- ~. ]6 D- y8 w
/ I" i, d) ^$ I6 |4 z i: l4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，" `) ^: s ?8 G6 D( ~
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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' S$ G! v/ M$ N4 o我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!4 @" X( \3 ~1 F, P* G% F
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她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!3 ^& S) o5 N( P A
9 B% h/ ^. F/ q% Y J5 w晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，( N6 Z }6 C4 [8 e" m% m
1 c0 {. u2 s6 P% G就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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/ N9 F; j2 {1 t7 v! g. ?孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…4 A$ k5 m: B. O2 A2 Y
; y# I6 Q) m# M& z0 k; Z& J5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，
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. a r* L3 }; K2 `+ m) d* v$ ~我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！0 |2 J0 m' W8 e
# d% P) n) `, t; t一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。3 k( l7 K- s# Q# W
$ c' T7 g+ ^& F4 R% o6 C' U当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？& W0 `) J1 B2 ]% `
5 \# Z$ D& Q7 k& t. Y' ]我，无业闲人一个。
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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7 j0 a$ j5 S! o/ n4 V1 N我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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( i1 ^# r$ g3 f女：滚她妈犊子，滚…
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当前离线
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