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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”. d1 a# S+ X% i9 z1 k r
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2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”- Z2 I$ b( a2 \1 ]' H$ h' d
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。& J) e0 Z f. X5 U7 N2 C
+ `: ?; M+ ?3 |) D8 u老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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笑死我了。。。
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，3 I9 `3 V$ G( o
/ B5 n! A; U; `9 [+ _可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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7 v8 B" ^1 Y. {& ]' c5 O我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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) N$ `+ A) w! c" G4 o0 h0 a7 P她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!+ k1 l1 Z# o: K* g0 {( r1 O
& P) Q" c0 v0 f$ E% K7 e晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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3 L" T, q) s0 R( L1 W恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，
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我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！& o. b {: e4 v! |
/ k2 z; s7 [8 O8 ^' G. `8 w. t一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？
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我，无业闲人一个。& r0 L8 l& a* h) V% D4 ~$ a# {- n
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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% J- l& j' F! W女：滚她妈犊子，滚…, p2 O# f5 I3 }0 W4 I4 I K
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当前离线
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