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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”3 r: ^+ H. i( ^
+ J9 Z) e# L5 c2 P2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”5 O, j1 k4 P3 Q0 d& e+ b q/ Z6 d7 R$ Y
l" M7 G8 d1 A# d
男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”' c8 y C' ^+ I t
( C8 Y4 V8 N9 ~4 d- ^; A7 d1 U: G3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。! N8 t" \& n& G( P0 V+ a$ c5 l
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。3 b! s+ |/ W* Z% F6 S5 {
; U: b7 e2 m: q$ h9 D' M" t- Z笑死我了。。。; Z+ X+ K- x9 Y) D' a
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，" Y, J. ]5 N6 |! p! E3 ]
+ C0 R* n$ K, r9 }( I可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭， l' [& d4 O* ~# ]5 ?$ F
7 A$ A' y% U; t$ X我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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5 t. M1 F& L2 |- @! `& ]3 r/ f她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……” m% F- W" P! S
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恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，# e! f) e6 W T5 ^ h4 ]4 ?3 |8 M
- s( O x$ D' _ ^. R我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！
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一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。6 t3 c1 Z- a9 z; z- Q
( ]& ~8 s- C& U" c- X当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？3 m3 W$ n0 R0 Q7 x4 P
+ ]+ [* u: Q+ ?我，无业闲人一个。 @4 g3 ?# \9 }2 h0 c& ~* t. L
! C; u7 w+ W# ? L1 i女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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2 F v$ x' {1 k, R1 p我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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, _4 f( g; Q/ Q7 ?2 G4 j女：滚她妈犊子，滚…# G. a; N2 k9 x* m5 C) ?
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当前离线
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