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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
! e t4 o3 T5 K6 k2 `! p: i# t4 Y
3 W* v( @' H2 H% p! Y+ [6 B; C6 |2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”+ g2 y3 ?) {: p2 z$ n
2 R& x k. y. M) F1 T3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。, k% W5 r! Q) m" r5 R
7 h* b9 U( t8 B# A女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
2 t9 f) B* E( R( u: v9 l+ }; R+ B9 A* b8 Y6 y6 j
笑死我了。。。. {; Q# [$ O j2 S, h- W
* b& m% ^; F2 t6 G4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
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' m% C. C% B+ p, ?' U) R1 w- n可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!( _1 Y% o" {7 F! L. M
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她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!. ?* q+ [- f6 q7 I' u: m1 k I
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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2 b2 L. L, g7 U; g* s9 J恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，2 k2 a: f1 x) w3 J) q1 S+ Z4 ^
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”6 A& E2 h" i* w: H
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…1 o5 B/ K7 T1 N& j
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，3 b$ z u: J% a% |/ G" P& d& @
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我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！
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: f$ B' n( C) N# |一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。4 w- ~) d) H) I' Q
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当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？0 t0 ^. @+ y: b U) @
. k- y' I0 B$ k4 P我，无业闲人一个。
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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: s2 g2 n% e0 B2 ~0 P4 O, W8 m我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。6 m5 B; }" q& j: c- ^# n) K( X+ n
% S) i3 M% [" \: H$ v女：滚她妈犊子，滚…( t. L) _1 d; b* @0 F, x# N
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当前离线
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